It's dangerous to go alone, take this...

Drawing of me and my Longsands friends, drawn by Hayley.
I'm the one on the top right, with the massive smile.

Hey...hey you!  Oi!!  Are you going to read this blog or arent you?  Right, well pay full attention.  I know it's April Fools day but that doesn't give you the right to go around biting vacuum cleaners.  Well we have a lot to talk about today, let me clear my throat "err hmhmhmhmmhmhm"  there we go, and here we go....

NEWS!!  I got an email yesterday from those I had that interview with a week ago today, and they're going to be giving me an offer!  Success!  I have a placement sorted, well providing that i'll accept their terms.  I will accept no less than two 30 minute lunch hours, I'm sorry but it's just the times we're in.  Secondly, I want an assistant, not to help me with my work, but to sit on my desk and tell tales of a boat that hit an iceberg and sank.  Sounds sad doesnt it?  But theres a happy ending; one rich girl...who's love she met on the boat... she doesn't die, but gets made a member of the cabinet office and later builds a glass house to keep her greetings cards in.  Brilliant right?!  I know.  But no, they've asked me to go and have yet another interview with them, this time in London and with the CEO.  It's still not decided if I will reside in Oxford or London, though I really want Oxford.  London is more expensive, Oxford is nicer...hard choice really.

So uni has finished, for now.  3 weeks off then nothing to do until the end of May as I have 2 exams.  But unfortunately I still have 1 assignment due next because of my 2 week extension.  Grrr.  But I'm thinking of trying to get another extension on it, if I can flood the uni with cattle over the weekend, then they may forgive me for handing it in late.  After all, nine out of ten people don't like cattle.  As for my free time, I know what you're all thinking "Dave, we know you're so caring, but you dont have to travel to Brazil to fund raise for the Rio carnival again"  well if you say so...fine.  How about I stay in Bournemouth, carry on working at the co-op, and do sod all else?   "OH DAVE!!! You're so amazing!  How did you know thats what we wanted you to do?!  You're so smart, we think you should be new CEO of BP!"  Oh you guys, you're so flattering.  But no, I don't think I should be the new CEO of BP, I'm not slick enough.  Satire.

I bought 2 tickets for Sarah and I for the summerball in June today.  For those of you who don't know, the summerball is a huge festival for thousands of BU students...I'm sure there will be a disk jockey, ethanol enhanced bevarages and jitterbugging.  Naw, i'ts amazing, but we dont know the line up yet.  Last year we couldn't get our first choice artist so had to go to Plan B...play on words there.  (Plan B is a singer by the way for those across the seas).  It ends at 5:30 am with everyone gathering on the beach for the 'survivors photo' and the mourning of those who didnt' survive.  Funeral directors love the summer ball.  Speaking of death, I have a funny feeling the Queen will die this year, not being harsh I just have a feeling.  After all, Gadaffi needs a new place to stay and I cant imagine he'd want her around telling him not to leave his empty coffee mugs all around the place.  Believe me, that guy must drink a LOT of coffee, I mean have you seen his face?  Theres no chance he's ever slept since being conceived, he looks like a deflated beach ball thats been stuffed into a tuna can and then set on fire by some rebel.  Topical.

Thank you to all my bloggies, you've helped spread this blog to over 10 countries, whats more is that readership in March was 184% higher than in February.  Amazing.  Thank you all.  But like a chip shop out of curry sauce, its Tartare for now.

Video for the SummerBall last year SOOO GOOOD