|Cheeky Chappies :)|
- Officially change each of their names : Now think about it, 'Johnny Hornsworth' isn't going to be quite so hard when he's suddenly turned into 'Eugene Calculus' and 'Chelsi Stott' turns into "Pinot Noir the 3rd"
- Ultra-vibrating vocal chords: This causes any mouthy whatsit to sound like a right muppet by causing his voice to sound like he's constantly driving over speed bumps. He's not going to be shouting abuse at Pensioners anymore.
- Remove all innapropriate housing: 78% of all chavs stem from houses populated with far too many brothers and sisters and therefore less discipline and food. The old woman who lived in a shoe, she had so many children she didn't know what to do (other than use contraception). Therefore I dub that all forms of footwear shall no longer be allowed for accommodation purposes, be they High-Top houses or Flat flats.
- Dress code for sports shops: If we make it so that you can only get access to JJB and SportsDirect by wearing clothes OTHER than what they already sell such as a waistcoat, top hat and maybe some trousers that have absolutely no arse revealage, people who gain access may slowly become more upperclass and less annoying...just a theory.\
So there we go guys. Hope that will get you back into the swing of things. You'll be hearing from me again soon Biffos!