|I used to be Japanese until Kodak fired me...|
- Buy a hammock, all podgy peeps like a hammock. But replace the netting with cheese wire so that chunks of flub with just fall through it. Kind of like an industrial sieve.
- Confiscate all mobile phones from the butter bellies and replace them with morse code transmitters. They may be ordering pizza but the constant tapping will cause them to lose weight in their index fingers in days.
- Remove all calendars from their houses. If Chub Norris hasn't got his eye set on Christmas Dinner, he might decide to stop practising for it.
- Try my new invention. It's a mirror which enhances Fatorexia™. A gibbly gump who looks into the mirror will see a skinny good looking version of themselves. This causes them to go into Fatolemia™ where they purge all their gastric gunk out to leave them with the body of a Greek god.
So there you go buddys. So mildly insulting trivia for you to feast on, but not too much now or you'll need to take that step by step guide yourself. Catch you soon chickadees